3 Things Good Sports Parents Do

As a Director of a 300 player program, I have had many opportunities to observe sports parents.

Good sports parents do these three things: Win, Lose or Draw.

My father would always tell me, before a contest, that he loved me "...win, lose or draw". If I had a bad performance, he would say to me, " You are my son and I love you win, lose or draw." I was not completely sure why my father said those words to me, until I began to observe how good sports parents and athletes interacted after good and bad performances. He said those words to me because that is what good sports parents do.

One way or another, good sports parents make certain their athletes know they care about them more than the result. Win, lose, or draw. Honesty is the best policy,but...you have to be positive too!

One of the most delicate reoccurring moments in youth sports is when a player and parents are re-uniting after a tough performance. You know your child. You know how they are feeling about what just happened. Your heart is in your throat. What to say? What to do? You can not fool them. They know what happened.

Be honest. Acknowledge it. Tell your child, "hey, tough time out there" or "Too bad about that last drive". Then quickly remind them of the things they did during the course of the game and/or how much they have improved. Any stranger off the street can watch your athlete and tell them what they did wrong - nothing special about pointing out the obvious. But only a good sports parent will know how much better they have become and how well they did overall.

TIP: Make a list of improvements your athlete has made in a quiet moment. The excitement of a contest can make it hard to recall them when needed.

Set the Example.

Good sports parents are awesome at showing restraint, poise and perspective when contests get exciting or if there is an emotional outcome. They are great models for their own athletes and any one who is watching. It not surprising that their athletes exhibit poise and perform well when things get tough.

In youth sports there are a lot of things to observe and make remarks about. It is sport after all, and sports are huge piece of our cultural fabric. But when it comes to youth sports, good sports parents do a great job of behaving and talking like they want their athletes to behave and talk.

TIP: If you find yourself "too" into a game, watch from further away. Distance has a way of cooling passions and sharpening perspective.

Athletes First, Winning Second.