In the beginning it is often recommended that you take baby steps. Creating small goals and then moving forward from there. Smaller goals are easier to achieve and will build confidence. Like anything in life that is worth it, it will take some hard work and you will need to invest a fair amount of time. Rome was not built in a day. The important thing to keep in mind is; Rome was built.
The Importance of Positive Encouragement
Praise is much more motivating than punishment. When people hear the word discipline the first thing that tends to come to mind is being punished. This is mainly because in the past that was how most people dealt with aggressive kids. Even when children misbehaved out of simple misunderstood learning experiences. The motto back when we were growing up was; punish them first then figure out what happened.
If your parenting children of aggression then the nature of discipline will need a more in-depth understanding as well as a more definitive look. Discipline comes from the word disciple. This word defines as the ability to guide or give guidance. This is a much better understanding than that of punishment, which was how we learned about discipline.
Today we are smarter and we understand that to get better results, as well as building a real relationship, we need to use constructive methods. This is an improvement. One that was not made overnight. Similarly, the way we are able to change our behavior will work with changing the aggressive behavior of our children. Though these goals will take some time, they are more than worth it.
Just like when you are learning something new, you begin by taking small steps and keeping small goals. By keeping goals small and easily attainable you increase your child's success and your opportunities to give praise. The power of praise is many cases truly amazing. Often even unbelievable. The same goes for the results it brings. Your child lives for your approval and attention. You should take any opportunity you can to offer your child positive feedback.
One suggestion is to focus some of your praise unevenly. Surprise your child by giving praise even when they fail. Their efforts should count for something and when you do this right your child will bend over backwards to impress you. If you show your children unconditional acceptance and demonstrate confidence in their abilities, their self esteem will skyrocket. They will ultimately channel their aggressive energies towards accomplishing positive goals.
All children can learn to change. Though some will take longer than others your positive encouragement will mean more to them than you could ever imagine. Once children see that they are able to change through your guidance in accomplishing smaller goals, they will have more confidence to carry on. Parenting children of aggression will eventually pay off big time in the long run.