Kids' Personalities and Socialization

Have you ever been on the receiving end of a first impression from someone who really didn't know you? Sometimes this can work to your advantage, which is why we create a professional appearance for a job interview. Sometimes it is not to your advantage.

In a perfect world this would not happen at all, and would definitely not happen with children, but we don't live in a perfect world. Elementary school teachers often show favoritism, even when they try not to. It may be hard for children to watch another child being favored.

My three daughters all have very distinct personalities. My youngest will talk the leg off a table, explaining anything and everything. The oldest is very shy and reserved, but works the hardest in her studies. My middle daughter is somewhere in between, and talks a lot during class.

If your child is complaining about other kids being favored, don't panic or react right away.

Instead, talk to your child and ask them why they feel this way. Is it something they noticed in class?

Maybe they overheard other children talking - did they actually see the behavior themselves? Children should understand that everyone has different personalities and some will always be more outgoing than others. This doesn't make those people better or more popular, they may just be noticed more.

A child and teacher laughing doesn't have to imply a favorite. Calling on the same students during class can be innocent. Perhaps the teacher doesn't want to embarrass students who don't know the answer and is calling on those who raise their hand first.

Does your child feel left out, perhaps? Talk to them about what they can do about this. Encourage them to join in on the laughter when appropriate and to raise their hand when the teacher asks a question. Often with a little effort, they'll be known as the teacher's pet as well.