5 Key Steps to Build Your Child's Self Esteem

We all know, as adults, that self-esteem is important as it's a fragile thing. Indeed, in our life, we experience ups and downs in our own self-esteem because it depends on several factors. I'm here to talk to you about building your child's self-esteem. It's a very important thing, probably one of the most important things you have to bring to your child. How he feels about himself as a child will determine his behavior now and in the future.

To put some clear words on the self-esteem notion, we can say that it's about feeling capable of doing things, feeling loved, knowing we belong to a group of people, a family, that people need us, that we have a unique value and that the things we accomplish are worthwhile. Your child's self-esteem is the root of his personality and I'm glad to share with you 5 key steps to build it.

1- Pay attention and listen to what your child says. Make eye contact while he talks. React, answer, ask questions, show interest to make him feel that what he experiences has value. He'll feel important through your eyes, and that means a lot to him. Take that precious time.

2- Encourage your child. Tell him you believe in him but be careful not to put too much pressure on him. Don't seek perfection. Acknowledge the good things he does and when he fails at doing something, acknowledge the fact that he tried and the progress he made.

3- Don't compare your child to his friends or brothers and sisters. Never. Even positively. Just celebrate his uniqueness. Don't tell him he's good comparing to others, or better or nicer. He's just himself and you like him for his uniqueness. It'll help him value himself rather than trying to compete with others.

4- Show it's ok to make mistakes. Tell him we all do some, talk about your own mistakes. Make him understand his mistakes are here to help him understand things and do better next time.

5- Show him and tell him that you love him in an unconditional way. Yes, you love him no matter what. This is extremely important. Your love for your child isn't always obvious for him. Indeed, children often mistake punishments for a lack of love, especially when parents don't explain everything. To build your child's self-esteem, you have to explain that when you punish, it's because his behavior is unacceptable, not him. Never say he's a bad kid. Kiss him a lot, hug him a lot and say you love him no matter who he is, no matter what he does. It's the best thing you can do to help him build his self-esteem, make him know he has your unconditional love.

I do hope you'll apply these key steps and will seize the importance of building your child's self-esteem in every reaction you have, in every thing he does. Be coherent, constant in your love and rules. Giving tools for your child to become a responsible, loving and sensitive adult is the best thing you can do for him.