I have found that boys crave for affection from their parents just as much or even more than girls. But we tend to dismiss them so quickly. For instance when they cry or sulk you here parents say, 'don't cry you are a boy.' Boys tend to be denied love too early which makes them go after girls because they still want to cuddle up with someone who is willing to let them. They want a girlfriend not because they really know what love is themselves but because they need someone to hold them, hug them and make them feel 'soft' and 'gentle'. If however, they are at the stage of puberty, sexual desires creep in and as they have always learned to suppress their feelings, they feel the urge to dispense now and see no reason why not.
Discussing with a few girls recently they informed me that the boys pressure them so much and refusal means the friendship is over. To be honest that saddened my heart. The girls were between sixteen and seventeen. In schools sex is mentioned to a child at about the age of ten but many parents are guilty of never mentioning a word about sex to their sons even at sixteen. Who do we expect to tell our sons or much more guide them if not the parents? From all what they see and hear they are already yearning to know what the 'hush hush' topic is all about so raising the subject will offer appropriate guidance and you a peace of mind.
A major influence is peer pressure. Those who have had sex tend to boast about it making the others feel out of touch and awkward by still being virgins. So it is up to us to encourage our sons to maintain their integrity.
Boys persuade girls to give in to their desires, if she refuses he says she doesn't love him, but when she gives in he wants more and more. As parents, it is our duty to guide our sons. First, demonstrate true love and encourage him to burn his energy elsewhere by signing him up at a football club, basket ball pitch, in a pool swimming or on the tracks running. He could play the guitar or other instruments, if not, involve him in what you do especially if you have a business of your own.
Do not assume that your son wants to be love free because he behaves as if he could not care less. Such ones are those who really yearn for love. Make out time to talk with your son, so you know his thoughts and feelings. It might be easy if you have developed a rapport with him but if it is what you just have to initiate, this is a good starting point. Maybe he always locks himself in his room, try and get him to spend more time with the other members of the family. Maybe everyone in your household stay apart anyway, it is a good way of bringing them all together. You can save your son and yourself from bitter repercussions by starting today with no delay.
Are you a concerned parent or teenager who wants to maintain your integrity visit the family unit and teenskorner at http://www.hopefortheliving.com for more inspiration.
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